Destination: Unknown

This has been building up inside me for some time so excuse the slight rambly nature of it. I intend for this blog to be light-hearted, entertaining (hopefully) and fun, while also talking about some issues I have opinions on.

I'll just get all my personal crap out of the way first. I may elaborate on some points I've raised here in later posts but for now, well, this is me.

Who am I?

Hello,

My name is Alan and...I don't really know who I am.

I am 21 years old and I still live with my parents. I have no real qualifications to speak of other than a secondary (or high) school education which, I'll be honest, I just about scraped by. I've never been to college other than a summer course in Film Production.

The only job I've ever had has been assissting my father in his furniture shop which is suffering greatly during the recession. It is no longer a question of whether it will close but when.

The topic of my future has been rattling around inside my head for a while now and I haven't been able to pin down an answer.

Yesterday evening, my mother gave me the news that she has decided to shut up shop and prepare the house for sale. I have known that this was an eventuality but when she said it, I did feel panicked. This has forced me to reevaluate my life and consider the next stage.

All of the anxieties came to the front of my mind; what will I do?, where will I go?, how do I prepare?, what if I fail?

Why am I here?

About 8 months ago I was diagnosed with having ADHD. I see it as one of the reasons why my life has taken the direction it has. I say one of the reasons because I don't want to see it as the sole obsticle I have to overcome in order to get my life straight.

I have just recently started medication for it and WOW have I felt the difference. It's nothing major. In fact for the first few days, it was only in retrospect which I recognised it. I feel like my head is clearer. I become less frustrated with dull or repetitive tasks and I have more energy.

It has also given me more confidence in my ability to live a proper life.Also, I feel more able to do the things I have always wanted to try.

I am a member of a few internet forums. Usually posts from me are slow to come, and when they do, it takes the form of one or two sentences. Since starting my treatment, posts have been getting longer and more detailed and I said to myself that 'if you have so much to say on this topic, why not start up that blog you've been thinking about doing for ages?'

What am I doing?

I have always expressed an interest in writing. I have spent my life coming up with ideas for stories but never being able to just sit down and focus long enough to get any written. I attribute this failing to my ADHD. Focus and patience don't come easily to me (just realised that rhymed :) ). But, with my medication clearing my head of noise and the need for constant stimulation, I have been able to work on my projects and not give up at the first sign of writer's block.

I have been working on some short stories and, I suppose you might call them 'opinion pieces' and I want to show them off here and get some feedback on them to see if I can actually write.

What now?

Right now, well, I am going to bed as its ten to one in the morning.

Tomorrow I will begin working on forging a new life for myself. A few weeks ago, this post would not have been possible. I would have struggled with how to word the first few sentences and just given up. I used to think my life was destined to stand still and not amount to anything. Now, I'm looking forward to the future.